Although we have a lot to look forward to, Christmas this year is going to be tough for many of us.
We might be worried about money, missing people who aren’t around, lonely or dealing with some really difficult situations. For some children in Hull this will be their first Christmas in foster care.
We understand how difficult Christmas is for so many.
So much emphasis is put on being a perfect family at Christmas. Films, TV and Christmas songs generally reference love, Mum, Dad, siblings or extended family and friends all coming together in happier times.
Some people will not experience a happy Christmas this year for so many reasons. Many children in foster care find Christmas time overwhelming and upsetting. Our foster carers are amazing and know our children very well. Hull Fostering work really closely with our carers to make sure they are supported, we encourage our carers to talk to us about anything troubling them and how we can all support the child and the foster family who are struggling.
Christmas can be difficult for anyone, at any point in their life, here are some Christmas coping tips, you might find helpful:
- Managing Relationships; whether you foster or not, there will be times when you and your family need support or when you are not sure how to make things better. There are a group of services in Hull collectively known as Early Help who can support you at these times and make problems easier to understand and quicker to solve. Please visit the Early Help Support website for further information. If you are a foster carer, please speak to your fostering social worker.
- Coping with money worries; Citizens Advice has information on how to get help if you’re struggling to pay your bills. Food banks also offer help beyond a food parcel, please visit this link to find out where your nearest food bank is and what additional services and support they offer. Please also visit Hull City Council’s website to find out what other benefits, crisis payments and support they can offer you.
- Importance of Looking After Yourself; let people know you’re struggling. It can help to talk to someone you trust about how you’re feeling, although sometimes talking to someone you do not know is sometimes easier. There are many support groups in Hull, #AndysManClub is a group for men to go and talk. Currently there are 4 meeting places in Hull and three in East Yorkshire, for more information email info@andysmanclub.co.uk or find out more on their website here. Connect Well Hull is a friendly, free and confidential service for people living in Hull and are registered with a Hull GP. They help people manage their health better and improve wellbeing by providing advice and supporting them to access local community groups, activities and services. You can access a Wellbeing Co-ordinator who can help you find out what organisations can benefit you or a Welfare Adviser who offer advice on a wide range of issues from money to family problems, to benefits, housing and employment. Appointments can be made on their website here or call 01482 2176670 or email enquiries@connectwellhull.org.uk
Hull Fostering have 8 monthly support groups, especially for our foster carers, which provide an opportunity for our carers talk to other Hull Fostering foster carers, make friends, support one another and relax.
- Tell people what they can do to help. And let them know if there’s anything they could avoid doing. For example, you could let them know any activities you’d like to be involved in, and what they can do to support you during Christmas. Or you could tell them any questions or topics that you find hard to discuss, so they can avoid asking about them.
You don’t have to justify yourself to others. But you might feel pressure to, especially if someone asks a lot of questions. It could help to let them know that certain situations are difficult for you, and tell them what they can do to help. It might also help to tell them that you understand they may see things in a different way.
You might not be able to make others understand. That’s OK. It’s not your responsibility to convince other people, or get their permission to look after yourself.
Please take care of yourselves, be kind to your heart and minds – it’s actually more common than you think to find Christmas a tricky time of year.
